Who says you can't put funny things on your blog?
TIMMY’S CHRISTMAS LETTER
Dear Santa,
How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the reindeer to
the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I would
like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for Christmas.
I hope you remember that come Christmas Day.
Merry Christmas,
Timmy Jones
* *
Dear Timmy,
Thank you for you letter. Mrs. Claus, the reindeer, and the elves are
all fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little
worried about all the time you spend playing video games and texting.
Santa wouldn't want you to get fat. Since you have indeed been a good
boy, I think I'll bring you something you can go outside and play
with.
Merry Christmas,
Santa Claus
* *
Mr. Claus,
Seeing that I have fulfilled the "Naughty vs. Nice" contract, set by
you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to
granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldn't want to turn
this joyous season into one of litigation. Also, don't you think that
a jibe at my weight, coming from an overweight man who goes out once a
year, is a bit trite?
Respectfully,
Tim Jones
* *
Mr. Jones,
While I have acknowledged you have met the "nice" criteria, need I
remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it a
guarantee of services to be provided. Should you wish to pursue legal
action, well, that is your right. Please know, however, that my
attorney's have been on retainer ever since the
Burgermeister-Meisterburger incident and will be more than happy to
take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I alluded to
will not only improve your health, but also improve your social
skills, and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the
bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.
Very Truly Yours,
S Claus
* *
Now look here, Fat Man!
I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was attempting
to be polite about this, but you brought my looks and my friends into
this. Now you just be disrespecting me. I'm about to tweet my boys and
we're gonna be waiting for your fat ass and I'm taking my game
console, my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I
WANT, MAN!
T-Bone
* *
Listen Pizza Face,
Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the
world on one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger
wannabe? "He sees you when you're sleeping; He knows when you're
awake." Sound familiar, genius? You know what kind of resources I have
at my disposal. I got your shit wired, Jack. I go all around the world
and see ways to hurt people that if I described them right now, you'd
throw up your Totino's pizza roll all over the carpet of your mom's
basement. You're not getting what you asked for, but I'm still
stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in your ass and then walk it
dry.
Chew on that, Petunia.
S Clizzy
* *
Dear Santa,
Bring me whatever you see fit. I'll appreciate anything.
Timmy
* *
Timmy,
That's what I thought, you little bastard.
Santa
Friday, December 14, 2012
Friday, July 27, 2012
I finally did it! I have my dream job!
I plan on writing a real blog post about the past year and what it took for me to finally land a position that I wanted. For now, this will have to do!
After multiple interviews for 3 different positions, I was hired on by The Financial Planning Association. This organization was on my top 10 list as a company I wanted to work for. So, I kept my eye on them and in contact with the marketing team.
The best advise I can give any long term unemployed job seeker is this:
Don't give up! Even if you take a small break, keep looking at open positions, keep contacting the people you really want to work with and not for, and always remember that even though there doesn't seem to be a position for you right now, you never know what will happen next week!
Stay as positive as possible, be grateful everyday even when it seems there is nothing to be grateful for, and do for others what you wish others would do for you.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
The new job seeker tool, vizualize.me - Lucinda's profile
vizualize.me - Lucinda's profile
How cool is this new tool for us job/business seekers. I signed up for this program a few months back and had forgotten all about it. I will most likely add the infographic link to my resume. It's a pretty cool way to see your work.
How cool is this new tool for us job/business seekers. I signed up for this program a few months back and had forgotten all about it. I will most likely add the infographic link to my resume. It's a pretty cool way to see your work.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
MAPP Assessment: Aptitude for the job
My determination to get the right position for my career goals is very important. In order to show the WIIFM(Y) (what's in it for me or you) factor for a hiring manager I am including a portion of the MAPP Assessment that talks about my aptitude for the job at hand.
APTITUDE FOR THE JOB (Expression of performing tasks)
Lucinda's preferences and motivations are derived from understanding the deeper or 'real' meaning of ideas and words and uses them effectively in written or oral communication. Literary in this factor means intentional search for ideas expressed by the minds of others for one's own use, assimilation, learning, etc. The source can be books, other publications, historical documents, research information, drama, movies, television, the "information highway" or internet, etc. Emphasis is on communication: picking up information from minds of others or communication aimed toward the minds of others. Journalism and writing are major activities. Literary activity is not exclusively intellectual, academic, or cultural. It may be an end in itself as in a bookworm for instance. And literary activity is not always accompanied by communicative activity, written or oral. On the other hand, communicative activity need not be literary in the classic sense. And one need not be persuasive to be communicative, but it helps. When the trait is highly motivated, as it is here, it suggests both literary and communicative abilities that are or could become a usable skill or a developed talent. By now you can see that only a review of all traits will clearly show the specific content of Lucinda's literary and/or communicative preferences and motivations.
APTITUDE FOR THE JOB (Expression of performing tasks)
Lucinda's preferences and motivations are derived from understanding the deeper or 'real' meaning of ideas and words and uses them effectively in written or oral communication. Literary in this factor means intentional search for ideas expressed by the minds of others for one's own use, assimilation, learning, etc. The source can be books, other publications, historical documents, research information, drama, movies, television, the "information highway" or internet, etc. Emphasis is on communication: picking up information from minds of others or communication aimed toward the minds of others. Journalism and writing are major activities. Literary activity is not exclusively intellectual, academic, or cultural. It may be an end in itself as in a bookworm for instance. And literary activity is not always accompanied by communicative activity, written or oral. On the other hand, communicative activity need not be literary in the classic sense. And one need not be persuasive to be communicative, but it helps. When the trait is highly motivated, as it is here, it suggests both literary and communicative abilities that are or could become a usable skill or a developed talent. By now you can see that only a review of all traits will clearly show the specific content of Lucinda's literary and/or communicative preferences and motivations.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Seriously...I am ready to be hired by the right company.
In 2008 I took a free MAPP test. The Assessment.com definition is "stands for Motivational Appraisal of Personal Potential. MAPP is based on motivation and is used to help individuals pinpoint where to apply themselves so they can choose careers and make life choices that are in sync with their natural motivations. After all, if you like what you do it will feel more like a hobby than work."
I recently read that assessment again because I was feeling down about not getting any interviews or calls from all the companies I was applying to. I think I lost touch with my goals as far as company culture. I have been talking about it and do look for information but really, I was applying to anything that fit my skills.
The unemployment reality is, every so often we need to go back and look at what we want, what we are really good at, and go from there. The desperation of needing a job sometimes over takes us. So, once again I am re-focusing my job search to better align with my "natural motivations".
So let me share one part of what MAPP says about me. This is really interesting.
INTEREST IN JOB CONTENT (Those tasks you want to perform)
Lucinda is conscious of existence, meaning, purpose, potential and destiny of humankind, people, and self. Lucinda is motivated by a self-felt, self-accepted calling to the cause of good, growth, and gain in the lives of others. Influential communication of ideas is a primary way of achieving those objectives. Perception and thinking tend to be holistic and conceptual; i.e., seeing the big picture. It is important to see which of the other traits are interactive with this trait because there can be many interesting combinations. This is a major trait in cultural, intellectual, academic, and creative activities. It includes ideas, concepts, theory, ethics, and values.
I think the main focus here for my job search, "sees the big picture". As a marketing manager and a self proclaimed lover of details and coordination, the big picture is important. I know how to direct my team to meet the big picture deadlines, budget constraints, and client goals.
So, if you have worked with me, do you think these things are true?
I recently read that assessment again because I was feeling down about not getting any interviews or calls from all the companies I was applying to. I think I lost touch with my goals as far as company culture. I have been talking about it and do look for information but really, I was applying to anything that fit my skills.
The unemployment reality is, every so often we need to go back and look at what we want, what we are really good at, and go from there. The desperation of needing a job sometimes over takes us. So, once again I am re-focusing my job search to better align with my "natural motivations".
So let me share one part of what MAPP says about me. This is really interesting.
INTEREST IN JOB CONTENT (Those tasks you want to perform)
Lucinda is conscious of existence, meaning, purpose, potential and destiny of humankind, people, and self. Lucinda is motivated by a self-felt, self-accepted calling to the cause of good, growth, and gain in the lives of others. Influential communication of ideas is a primary way of achieving those objectives. Perception and thinking tend to be holistic and conceptual; i.e., seeing the big picture. It is important to see which of the other traits are interactive with this trait because there can be many interesting combinations. This is a major trait in cultural, intellectual, academic, and creative activities. It includes ideas, concepts, theory, ethics, and values.
I think the main focus here for my job search, "sees the big picture". As a marketing manager and a self proclaimed lover of details and coordination, the big picture is important. I know how to direct my team to meet the big picture deadlines, budget constraints, and client goals.
So, if you have worked with me, do you think these things are true?
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Lessons from the unemployed
As some of you know I am an avid LinkedIn user. I sign in every morning and am actively connecting and talking to people. This past week I was talking with a new connection who had sent me a job posting she thought I would be interested in.
Unfortunately I wasn't qualified but that started a conversation with her where I came up with the idea of writing this blog post. We started talking about what type of job I am qualified for and where I want to work.
And there the thinking began.
I was laid off in September 2009 from an ad agency in California. It has been almost two full years that I have been in the job market. Now, this had me feeling like a big loser not long ago, until I realized, I have only lived in Colorado since September 2010. So, really it has been almost one year.
Now that year has been spent building up my connections and contacts, participating in multiple webinars on; how to use LI to get a job, how to find the "hidden job market", 10 steps to land a job,20 things to never say on a resume, interview techniques that are a must in today's job market, and the list goes on.
During the year of doing all of this, learning, connecting, writing my own blog, actually going out to meet people here in Denver, I have learned a very valuable lesson. After so many interviews of talking about what my strengths and weaknesses are I actually think I know.
Let me take you back two years for a minute. When I first hit the job market I was calling myself a "Marketing Generalist". One thing about being out of work is you are truly forced to look at yourself, your actual skills and strengths. When I first started this journey I thought I was a generalist, good at everything. Then over time I realized that having my toes in everything didn't necessarily mean I had experience in it or was even "good" at it.
The issue became, what does "generalist" actually mean? One webinar I participated in told me to have a specific title I was reaching for. So, I chose Director of Marketing, thinking that with all my years in the agency business, that shouldn't be a problem. Turns out, it was. Yes, I have managed teams to keep them on time and on budget. But, I have never been responsible for hiring and firing of agency staff. I have hired servers at restaurants and done all the training but that does not quite qualify for the professional world.
After taking a look at the position descriptions I changed my title to "Marketing Manager". It fits perfect, give me an opportunity to perform the tasks and learn so I can move to that director position. Oh, and let me add, an MBA is also asked for often with this level.
Let's return to the "now". One tip I learned in this down job market is that you must know what type of company you want to work for, what type of culture you require, and apply only to positions that actually fit those requirements. During my search for companies I want to work for, I have narrowed them down. This is not to say, I won't accept a position from a company that doesn't fit these exact requirements. After-all, I need a job and if I click with a company and a team, why not accept a position.
Here we go...I've narrowed my dream jobs down to a small to mid-size ad agency or a healthcare company with a smaller marketing department. I know now that my very best skill is managing a team, timelines, budgets, etc.
I have said it before, I have a strong personality. Not much scares me away and that is great when you work with a team of creatives. I love creative people and like to think of myself as one. They have a special quality that allows them to sit and design beautiful art and meaningful campaigns. They are also on their own clock. Timelines mean little to them during the creative process. It must be done right and to their standards or not done at all.
The balance for me and what I am really good at, is guiding them to meet the timelines. Talking to them about what the client needs from them. If they are an out of the box thinker and the client has a sand box we are required to play in, I know exactly how to get them to follow the rules. And I can do it because I respect what they do. I couldn't do what they do. Neither can the client. That is why we all have the jobs we have.
And this skill applies to everyone at an agency. I have been responsible for leading meetings to discuss traffic for the week, agency new business, and client creative briefs. keeping a group of people who are all passionate about what they do, on task and on topic is a special skill I have. How do I do it? I just say "Bring it back". Letting the conversation wander is an error and can lead to meetings lasting hours. I've seen it happen.
When it comes to budgets, managing the teams time is always an important aspect. The other important key is to budget high, find a lower cost, give those savings back to the client and have a joyous relationship forever.
Clients love it when you can save them money. And just because you say it will cost $10,000 and only costs $5,000 shouldn't mean you make that as a bonus. You already marked up the cost, the client knows you marked it up, and there is no need to take more. ETHICS people. Nothing turns me off faster than a cheat. I saw this done more than once and refuse to work with people like this.
Budgets are great! I love to know where I stand on a project. I love to know that if a client needs something designed, produced, and delivered in a time period that will require everyone to work overtime, I can budget that in. Client expectations are to always be exceeded...this is business 101. At the same time, it is our responsibility to set those client expectations from the start. We are not a charity, and neither are they. Well, they might be but that's not the point.
Making money, it's what we are all here to do. The clients need to make money to stay in business and we as an agency are no different. The conversations may be uncomfortable but when the rent is due, it is nice to know you have the funds to cover it.
And while I have been talking about agency work here, this all applies to a small corporate marketing team as well. Timelines, budgets and expectations all remain the same.
I mentioned above that I would like to work in healthcare and that comes from my time spent at IDG and KPA. There is something about the challenge of marketing medical device products and hospitals that keeps my mind moving. There are so many moving parts to being compliant with marketing messages that boredom is impossible.
Making a positive impact for the company I work for, the clients I work with, and for my own career is very important to me. This is why managing teams, timelines and budgets are my strongest assets. I am passionate about them and really good at them.
So, all that is left is to find the company that needs me, that I want to work for, and setting up my desk. It sounds so easy doesn't it?
I'd love to hear what your biggest lesson learned has been during your time looking for a position.
Unfortunately I wasn't qualified but that started a conversation with her where I came up with the idea of writing this blog post. We started talking about what type of job I am qualified for and where I want to work.
And there the thinking began.
I was laid off in September 2009 from an ad agency in California. It has been almost two full years that I have been in the job market. Now, this had me feeling like a big loser not long ago, until I realized, I have only lived in Colorado since September 2010. So, really it has been almost one year.
Now that year has been spent building up my connections and contacts, participating in multiple webinars on; how to use LI to get a job, how to find the "hidden job market", 10 steps to land a job,20 things to never say on a resume, interview techniques that are a must in today's job market, and the list goes on.
During the year of doing all of this, learning, connecting, writing my own blog, actually going out to meet people here in Denver, I have learned a very valuable lesson. After so many interviews of talking about what my strengths and weaknesses are I actually think I know.
Let me take you back two years for a minute. When I first hit the job market I was calling myself a "Marketing Generalist". One thing about being out of work is you are truly forced to look at yourself, your actual skills and strengths. When I first started this journey I thought I was a generalist, good at everything. Then over time I realized that having my toes in everything didn't necessarily mean I had experience in it or was even "good" at it.
The issue became, what does "generalist" actually mean? One webinar I participated in told me to have a specific title I was reaching for. So, I chose Director of Marketing, thinking that with all my years in the agency business, that shouldn't be a problem. Turns out, it was. Yes, I have managed teams to keep them on time and on budget. But, I have never been responsible for hiring and firing of agency staff. I have hired servers at restaurants and done all the training but that does not quite qualify for the professional world.
After taking a look at the position descriptions I changed my title to "Marketing Manager". It fits perfect, give me an opportunity to perform the tasks and learn so I can move to that director position. Oh, and let me add, an MBA is also asked for often with this level.
Let's return to the "now". One tip I learned in this down job market is that you must know what type of company you want to work for, what type of culture you require, and apply only to positions that actually fit those requirements. During my search for companies I want to work for, I have narrowed them down. This is not to say, I won't accept a position from a company that doesn't fit these exact requirements. After-all, I need a job and if I click with a company and a team, why not accept a position.
Here we go...I've narrowed my dream jobs down to a small to mid-size ad agency or a healthcare company with a smaller marketing department. I know now that my very best skill is managing a team, timelines, budgets, etc.
I have said it before, I have a strong personality. Not much scares me away and that is great when you work with a team of creatives. I love creative people and like to think of myself as one. They have a special quality that allows them to sit and design beautiful art and meaningful campaigns. They are also on their own clock. Timelines mean little to them during the creative process. It must be done right and to their standards or not done at all.
The balance for me and what I am really good at, is guiding them to meet the timelines. Talking to them about what the client needs from them. If they are an out of the box thinker and the client has a sand box we are required to play in, I know exactly how to get them to follow the rules. And I can do it because I respect what they do. I couldn't do what they do. Neither can the client. That is why we all have the jobs we have.
And this skill applies to everyone at an agency. I have been responsible for leading meetings to discuss traffic for the week, agency new business, and client creative briefs. keeping a group of people who are all passionate about what they do, on task and on topic is a special skill I have. How do I do it? I just say "Bring it back". Letting the conversation wander is an error and can lead to meetings lasting hours. I've seen it happen.
When it comes to budgets, managing the teams time is always an important aspect. The other important key is to budget high, find a lower cost, give those savings back to the client and have a joyous relationship forever.
Clients love it when you can save them money. And just because you say it will cost $10,000 and only costs $5,000 shouldn't mean you make that as a bonus. You already marked up the cost, the client knows you marked it up, and there is no need to take more. ETHICS people. Nothing turns me off faster than a cheat. I saw this done more than once and refuse to work with people like this.
Budgets are great! I love to know where I stand on a project. I love to know that if a client needs something designed, produced, and delivered in a time period that will require everyone to work overtime, I can budget that in. Client expectations are to always be exceeded...this is business 101. At the same time, it is our responsibility to set those client expectations from the start. We are not a charity, and neither are they. Well, they might be but that's not the point.
Making money, it's what we are all here to do. The clients need to make money to stay in business and we as an agency are no different. The conversations may be uncomfortable but when the rent is due, it is nice to know you have the funds to cover it.
And while I have been talking about agency work here, this all applies to a small corporate marketing team as well. Timelines, budgets and expectations all remain the same.
I mentioned above that I would like to work in healthcare and that comes from my time spent at IDG and KPA. There is something about the challenge of marketing medical device products and hospitals that keeps my mind moving. There are so many moving parts to being compliant with marketing messages that boredom is impossible.
Making a positive impact for the company I work for, the clients I work with, and for my own career is very important to me. This is why managing teams, timelines and budgets are my strongest assets. I am passionate about them and really good at them.
So, all that is left is to find the company that needs me, that I want to work for, and setting up my desk. It sounds so easy doesn't it?
I'd love to hear what your biggest lesson learned has been during your time looking for a position.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Cattle Dog's are my new mission!
This past December my husband and I adopted our first dog, Shelby. She is a Cattle dog, Blue Heeler. I can't say enough about how well behaved and easy to train she has been. I love her so much I want all of her cousins and other ACD's to find a great home too.
Check out this group and go to an event. You never know when you might meet your next family member. Or you can go online and see who is available.
This is from their website.
New Hope Cattle Dogs' mission is helping discarded, stray and unwanted Australian Cattle Dogs (ACD's) that need a second chance at finding a forever home and providing education and training to the public.
We believe that there is a special place out there for all unwanted and abandoned ACD's. We run a rescue group that strongly believes in spaying and neutering all pet quality dogs. All New Hope Cattle Dogs will be spayed or neutered, microchipped, dewormed, health checked, have a fecal exam and are up to date on all vaccinations that are age appropriate.
It is our duty to match your lifestyle with the dog's personality for a "perfect" fit. It is important to us to place the dog that is right for you and your family in your home. Therefore, there are strict guidelines and qualifications that all potential adoptive homes must meet before we place a dog in their home.
We rescue most of my dogs off of the euthanasia lists from local pounds/shelters and also take owner surrenders (there is an intake fee), although we frown upon owners who dispose of their pets because they are no longer convenient. Dogs are like children and should not be thrown away like old furniture. Please take the time to work with behavioral problems and the time to find a good home for your pet, if you really have a good reason to place them in a new home.
Contact them today!
Check out this group and go to an event. You never know when you might meet your next family member. Or you can go online and see who is available.
This is from their website.
New Hope Cattle Dogs' mission is helping discarded, stray and unwanted Australian Cattle Dogs (ACD's) that need a second chance at finding a forever home and providing education and training to the public.
We believe that there is a special place out there for all unwanted and abandoned ACD's. We run a rescue group that strongly believes in spaying and neutering all pet quality dogs. All New Hope Cattle Dogs will be spayed or neutered, microchipped, dewormed, health checked, have a fecal exam and are up to date on all vaccinations that are age appropriate.
It is our duty to match your lifestyle with the dog's personality for a "perfect" fit. It is important to us to place the dog that is right for you and your family in your home. Therefore, there are strict guidelines and qualifications that all potential adoptive homes must meet before we place a dog in their home.
We rescue most of my dogs off of the euthanasia lists from local pounds/shelters and also take owner surrenders (there is an intake fee), although we frown upon owners who dispose of their pets because they are no longer convenient. Dogs are like children and should not be thrown away like old furniture. Please take the time to work with behavioral problems and the time to find a good home for your pet, if you really have a good reason to place them in a new home.
Contact them today!
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